Life Goes On

While I've searched all my life for something or someone to make me feel wanted or loved. I guess that I've come to realize that you make the best with what you have. It's not been a life filled with romance and at times I have felt downright unwanted. I do have some wonderful children and Grandchildren. My husband and I are use to each other and we rarely get on each others nerves. Notice I say rarely. I had a good career and enjoyed nursing. I loved the elderly and did find it rewarding. But my life has been missing something. I don't think it's what I've spent my life searching for. What do I do now? I've changed my search. I'm trying to find what I missed out on when I turned my back on my calling. I want to get closer to God and learn more of his ways and his word. I've began to think that my perception of God has been wrong. I always felt he was to be obeyed or else,but what about David.Now if anyone tried God's patience it had to be David. But God loved him and blessed him. So maybe God can be a friend and a confidant. I know that He has touched my life many times,when I felt I didn't deserve it. So,I'm attempting to learn to Look at God in a different light. One that allows me to be open and free to talk to him as I would a friend not as a parent or disciplinary being.